英语笑话（精选）

　　又能笑又能加深印象!是学英语的好办法!以下是YJBYS小编为大家提供的，欢迎大家阅读。

　　篇一：情人节的梦

　　One night just before Valentine's Day a woman had a lovely dream about a beautiful necklace.

　　When she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamt that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it could mean?"

　　"You'll find out on Valentine's Day." he said with a knowing smile.

　　On Valentine's Day, the man gave his delighted wife a beautifully wrapped package.

　　Excitedly, she opened it, only to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams".

 

　　篇二：半个还是十分之五

　　Teacher: Would you rather have one half of an orange or five tenths?

　　Gerald: I'd much rather have the half.

　　Teacher: Think carefully, and tell me why.

　　Gerald: Because you lose too much juice when you cut the orange into five tenths.

 

　　篇三：聪明的儿子

　　One day, the father lets eight-year-old son send a letter. The son took the letter. The father then remembered he didn't write address and addressee's name on the envelope.

　　After the son comes back, the father asks him: "You have thrown the letter into the mail box?"

　　"Certainly."

　　"You didn't notice that?the envelope does not have address and addressee's name on it?"

　　"I certainly saw nothing written on the envelope."

　　"Then why?didn't you take it back?"

　　"I thought that you?did not write address and addressee, because you wouldn't let me know to whom you send the letter!"

 

　　篇四：什么也没留下

　　Mrs. Brown was going out for the day. She locked the house and tacked a note for the milkman on the door: "NOBODY HOME. DON'T LEAVE ANYTHING."

　　When she got back that night, she found her door broken open and her house ransacked. On the note she had left, she found the following message added:

　　"THANKS! WE HAVEN'T LEFT ANYTHING!"

　　布朗太太要外出一天。她锁好了房门，在门上给送牛奶的.人钉了一张便条：“家里没人，请不要留下任何东西!”

　　她当天晚上回家后发现房间门被撞开，房子被洗劫一空。在她留给送奶人的便条上，她发现被补充了一句：“谢谢!我们什么也没留下!”

 

　　篇五：好客

　　The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.

　　The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.

　　由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。

　　客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。