经典英语笑话大全笑破你的肚子痛

　　某学校发给学生的健康调查表里有个错别字把性别的性字写成了袜字。一位母亲在为她的儿子填写表格时，在袜别的那栏填上了：棕色为主。更多尽在应届毕业生笑话网。

　　理所当然

　　THE SCHOOL HEALTH FORMS had been distributed to the students with an error---the word Sex had been spelled with an o. One mother, filling out the form for her son, wrote in the blank next to Sox: Usually brown.

　　某学校发给学生的健康调查表里有个错别字把性别的`性字写成了袜字。一位母亲在为她的儿子填写表格时，在袜别的那栏填上了：棕色为主。

 

　　接着走吧

　　Seth Smith was reckoned the laziest man in town. Sotired had the authorities become of contributing to his supportthat they decided to consign him to a living tomb. Accordinglyhe was prepared for burial. The hearse was an old ramshacklecountry wagon.

　　As the strange cortege moved along some old residentasked, Who is it?

　　Why, Seth Smith, who is too lazy to get anything to liveon, so we are going to bury him alive.

　　I'll give him a bushel of corn, said one. And I will，said another.

　　Slowly raising his head, Seth asked: Is the corn shelled，neighbor?

　　No，you must do that yourself.

　　Gently replacing his head, he said: Drive on, boys, drive on.

　　塞思·史密斯被公认为镇上头号懒人。长官们实在懒得 再供养他，便决定把他送进一个天然坟墓里去。于是他被准备着去埋葬，灵车是一辆摇摇晃晃的乡下旧马车。

　　正当这列奇怪的送葬队伍在行进时，一些老街坊问道：这是谁啊?

　　唉，塞思·史密斯，他懒得没法活了，我们这就去把他活埋。

　　我来给他一蒲式耳谷子吧，一个人说。我也给，另一个说。

　　塞思慢慢抬起头来问道：谷子脱粒了吗，街坊?

　　没有，你得自己来。

　　他缓缓把头放回原处说：接着走吧，孩子们，接着走吧。

 

　　一个有心的乘客

　　Mr.Green went to Germany，because he had some work there.He came back last Monday，and his young wife met him at the airport.They walked to their car and passed a tall，pretty air hostess.Mr.Green said to her，Goodbye，Miss Harris， and the air hostess smiled and saidGoodbye too.

　　Mrs.Green stopped and looked at the air hostess.Then she said to her husband，How did you know her name?

　　That was easy，answered Mr.Green.The names of the captain and all the crew were on a piece of paper in front of our sests.

　　What was the name of the captain?Mrs.Green asked with a smile.

　　Mr.Green laughed and answered，I don't remember any of the other names.

　　格林去了德国，因为他在那里有些工作要做。他上星期一回国，他年轻的妻子到机场去接他。他们向他们的汽车走去，遇见了一位高挑、漂亮的空中小姐。格林先生对她说：再见，哈里斯小姐。那位空中小姐莞尔一笑，也说了声再见。

　　格林夫人停下来，看看那位空中小姐，然后她问她丈夫：你怎么知道她的名字?

　　这很容易，格林先生回答。机长和机组全体人员的名单都写在我们座位前的一张纸上。

　　那机长叫什么名字?格林夫人笑着问。

　　格林先生笑着答道：我不记得其他任何人的名字。