笑话大全笑破你的肚子的英语笑话7篇

　　以下是应届毕业生小编为你收集的7段，希望你喜欢。

　　英语笑话：饥荒可能是你造成的 Fat Man and Thin Man

　　A very thin man met a very fat man in the hotel lobby.

　　"From your looks," said the fat man, "there might have been a famine."

　　"Yes," was the reply, "and from your looks, you might have caused it."

　　【中文翻译】

　　在旅馆大厅里，一个非常瘦的人遇到了一个非常胖的人。

　　胖子说：“看你的样子，可能有过饥荒。”

　　“是的，”瘦子回答说，“看你的样子，饥荒可能是你造成的。”

　　英语：Birthday 生日

　　Professor: When is your birthday?

　　Kid: May 30.

　　Professor: Which year?

　　Kid: Every year.

　　教授：你的`生日是什么时候?

　　孩子：5月30日。

　　教授：哪一年?

　　孩子：每年都是。

　　英语笑话：两颗心脏在跳动 Two hearts beating

　　Nurse: How do you feel after your operation?

　　Patient: Quite alright, only I can feel two hearts beating inside me.

　　Nurse: No wonder the doctor who operated on you was looking for his watch everywhere just now.

　　护士：手术后你感觉怎样?

　　病人：十分好，只是我能感觉到我体内有两颗心脏在跳动。

　　护士：怪不得给你做手术的大夫刚才在到处寻找他的手表。

　　Social Worker 社会工作者

　　Two social workers were walking through a roughpart of the city in the evening.

　　有两名社会工作者在晚上的时候 走过市区的简陋地方。

　　They heard moans and muted cries for help from a back lane.Upon investigation,

　　他们听到从后巷传来的求救呻吟声和很小的哭喊声。

　　they found a semiconscious man in a pool of blood.

　　他们发现有一个意识不清的人躺在血泊之中。

　　"Help me,I've been mugged and viciously beaten " he pleaded.

　　他在恳求说：“救救我吧，我被人行凶抢劫，还遭到恶意痛打一顿。”

　　The two social workers turned and walked away .

　　这两名社会工作者转身离去。

　　One remarked to her colleague: " You know the person that did this really needs help."

　　其中一位向她的同事说：“你知道吧，于下这挡事的火才真 的需要协助呀。”

　　爆笑类笑话：兄弟般的关爱 Brotherly love

　　Teacher: Cassandra, if I saw a man beating a donkey and I stopped him, what virtue would I be demonstrating?

　　Cassandra: Brotherly love?

　　老师：Cassandra，如果我看见有人在殴打一头驴，我制止了他，我显示出了什么美德?

　　Cassabdra：兄弟般的关爱?

　　英语笑话：两个律师 Two Attorneys

　　Two attorneys went into a restaurant and ordered two drinks. Then they brought out sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat. The owner marched over and told them, "You can't eat your own sandwiches here!"

　　The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches.

　　【中文翻译】

　　两个律师走进一个餐厅，要了两杯饮料，从包中拿出三明治开始吃起来。餐厅老板走过来警告说，“你们不能在这里吃自己的三明治。”

　　两个律师对看了一眼，耸耸肩，然后交换了手中的三明治。

　　英语爆笑笑话：Its part of the game 我在扮演妈妈

　　Mother: Mary, why do you yell and scream so much? Play quietly like Eddie. See, he doesn't make a sound.

　　Mary: Of course he doesn't. Mom, it's part of the game we are playing. He is Daddy coming home late, and I'm you.

　　妈妈：玛丽，你为什么这样大喊大叫的? 为什么不能像艾迪那样安安静静的玩儿呢?你看艾迪一声儿都不出。

　　玛丽：妈妈，艾迪当然不会出声了，因为我们俩正在玩爸爸回家迟到的游戏呢，他扮演爸爸，我扮演你。