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笑破肚子英语笑话
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2024-12-06 01:00:00

笑破肚子英语笑话大全

  笑话总有一种魔力,能让我们忘掉不开心的事,以下是小编准备的笑破肚子大全,一起来爆笑吧!

  笑破肚子英语笑话大全(一)

  Father’s young peach tree

  Unexpected cold snaps had destroyed the bubs on my father’s youngpeach tree for two years in a row. This spring Dad was ready. Hereplanted the sapling in a large box, mounted it on wheels, and putthe tree in the garage whenever the temperaturedropped.

  One warm April day Dad was wheeling the tree out into the yard, andstopped to give our dog a drink from the garden hose. A neighborwatched the scene with amusement. “Frank,” he finally commented,“you’re the only man I know who walks his tree and waters hisdog!”

  ——Judee Hansen(Palos Park,Ill.)

  父亲的小桃树

  一场想不到的寒流摧毁了父亲的一排已经长了两年的小桃树。这年春天爸爸有所准备。他在一只大箱子里重新种下了树苗,把箱子放在一辆车子上。只要气温一下降,他就把树苗推到汽车房里去。

  一个温暖的春日,爸爸把树苗推出来放到院子里,然后停下来用橡胶软管给狗饮水。一位邻居看着这种情景消遣。“弗兰克,”他终于评论道,“你是我认识的唯一一位能让树走路,又给狗浇水的人。”

  ——贾德.汉森(帕洛斯,伊利诺斯州)

  笑破肚子英语笑话大全(二)

  Playing the crocodile

  Other school officials had already taken roles in student dramas.Now it was my turn, ad I was coerced into playing the crocodile ina high-school production of Peter Pan. My family was in the frontrow watching as I emerged on cue, encased in a heavy reptile suitwith jaws and a four-foot tail. Slithering awkwardly afterCaptain Hook, I fell off the stage, landing unhurt on theauditorium floor.

  Asthe bloodthirsty cheers from the audience died down, I heard myson-in-law say to my daughter, “It’s time we started a family. Allthe other adults here are watching their kids perform. We, I’m 30years old and watching my mother-in-law fall off a stage in acrocodile suit.”

  ——Lou Cook(Alexandria,Va.)

  扮演鳄鱼

  其他的学校员工都已经在学校戏剧中扮演过角色了。现在轮到了我,我被迫在中学的节目《彼得.潘》中扮演鳄鱼。当我穿着沉重的带有鳄鱼嘴、四只脚和尾巴的爬行动物服装刚刚出现在舞台的时候,我的`家人就坐在前排观看。我笨拙地跟在船长霍克后面爬行,掉下舞台,落到观众席前,尽管没有伤着。

  沉寂的观众席上响起雷鸣般掌声的时候,我听到我女婿对我女儿说:“我们也该有个孩子了。这儿所有其他成年人都在观看他们孩子的表演,而我,一个30岁的人却在观看丈母娘穿着鳄鱼服装从舞台上掉了下来。”

  ——卢.库克(亚历山大,弗吉尼亚州)

  笑破肚子英语笑话大全(三)

  Fat Man and Thin Man 饥荒可能是你造成的

  A very thin man met a very fat man in the hotel lobby. "From your looks," said the fat man, "there might have been a famine." "Yes," was the reply, "and from your looks, you might have caused it."

  在旅馆大厅里,一个非常瘦的人遇到了一个非常胖的人。 胖子说:“看你的样子,可能有过饥荒。” “是的,”瘦子回答说,“看你的样子,饥荒可能是你造成的。”



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