最新圣诞节英语笑话

　　Christmas Eve Service 平安夜礼拜

　　Just as I began my Christmas Eve service, the electricity in the church failed. The ushers and I found some candles and placed them around the sanctuary. Then I reentered the pulpit, shuffled my notes, and muttered, "Now, where was I?" A tired voice called out, "Right near the end!"

　　就在我开始平安夜祷告时，教堂停电了。教堂里的接待人员和我找到一些蜡烛，把它们放在礼堂周围。然后我重返讲道坛，整理了一下笔记后，我说：“刚才我讲到哪儿了?”传来一阵不耐烦的.声音：“马上就讲完了!”

　　A Christmas Gift 圣诞礼物

　　A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas.

　　圣诞节来了，一位先生给他太太送的圣诞礼物是一个非常漂亮的钻石戒子。

　　After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel-drive vehicles."

　　他朋友听到他买这么奢侈的礼物后，说到：“她不是想要辆四驱车吗”。

　　"She did," he replied. "But where was I going to find a fake Jeep?"

　　先生答：“是啊，(可以买到假钻石)，可去哪里能买一辆假吉普车呢?”

　　At Grandma's 在奶奶家过圣诞节

　　　Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs.

　　两个小男孩在奶奶家过平安夜，临睡前，两个小家伙跪在床边祷告，弟弟便扯开嗓子大喊出自己的愿望。

　　"I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE...

　　我希望收到一辆自行车...

　　I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO...

　　还有一部任天堂游戏机....

　　I PRAY FOR A NEW VCR..."

　　还有新的录像机

　　His older brother leaned over and nudged the younger brother and said, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf." To which the little brother replied, "No, but Gramma is!"

　　小男孩的哥哥搓了搓他说道：“你干嘛祷告得这么大声，上帝又不是聋子”。弟弟回答到：“我知道上帝不是聋子，可是奶奶是啊”。

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