讲给孩子听的英语笑话

　　会讲笑话的人都是有好人缘的人，所以我们要多亲近一些笑话大王们。现在小编也来当笑话大王啦!小编给大家收集整理了讲给孩子听的，一起来笑笑，收集好人缘吧!

　　讲给孩子听的英语笑话一：Like a Straw

　　There were these two not so bright guys who had to get across the desert. Since they didn't have enough money for a car they decided to buy a camel.

　　The camel dealer promised them that the camel would get them across the desert if they made sure he was full of water before they left. They took the camel down to the water hole, but the camel would not drink. So finally the first guy says: "I have an idea, why don't I hold his head down in the water and you suck on his butt. That way the water will be drawn up into him like a straw." The second gut thought about this for a while and finally agreed.

　　After a while the first guy asks "Well is it working?"

　　The second guy replied "I think it is going to work, but you have to pick his head up just a little because I'm just getting mud."

　　讲给孩子听的英语笑话二：Milk

　　There were three guys hitchiking along the roads of a plain, boring field because their car overheated from the long drive. Exhausted, hungry, and thirsty from the long walk, they weredesperately willing to stay over anywhere. Fortunately, they saw about a mile ahead of them a cow ranch, filled with hundreds of cows. They decided to stay there for the night. So they looked for the main office to ask the ranch owner if they could stay for the night. However, the ranch owner left for the day and no one was there. Too tired from their journey, they decided rather to sleep with the cows than walk forever. They each slept under a cow.

　　One guy said, "I'm hungry and thirsty, what will we eat and drink?"

　　Another guy suggested to drink the milk from the cow since they were lying beneath the milk sac. So they began to suck and drink.

　　The first guy said, "My cow's milk is so good, I finished it all and now I'm full."

　　The second guy said, "My cow's milk is so good, I finished it all and now I'm full."

　　The third guy said, "My cow's milk doesn't taste quite right."

　　The first and second guy then said to the third guy, "Well, try another nipple, that one probably has no more milk."

　　The third guy in a confused state exclaimed, "But how come my cow has only one, long, nipple!?"

　　讲给孩子听的英语笑话三：

　　I was surprised to learn that my 72-year-old mother dared to drive 900 miles in a 12-year-old car to visit me.When asked how she made out，she told me just fine...until her second night. She had filled the gas tank and didn't have the money for a motel room.

　　当听说我72岁的母亲居然开着12年的旧车行驶了900英里来看我时，我真有些吃惊。在我问她是如何做的时候，她告诉我她一切都好，只是到了第二天晚上，给汽车加油后却没有住旅馆的钱。

　　"What did you do?"I asked.

　　“那你怎么办了?”我问道。

　　" Well，"she began，“I was driving through this small town and feeling very sleepy. A policeman pulled me over and asked if I had been drinking. When I told him no，he wanted to know why I was weaving all over the road，I explained my situation,’‘Follow me，”he ordered.We then drove to a motel where the nice officer paid for my night's lodging.

　　她说:“嗨，我开到这个镇子时，感到很困，一位警寨叫住了我。他问我是否喝了酒，我说没喝。警察问我为什么开车在路上打晃晃。于是我解释了我的情况。他命令道:“跟我走。”就这样，我们就开到了一个汽车旅馆。警察替我付了住店费。

　　"As he was leaving,"Mother continued,”he turned to me and said,I Ma'am，the next time you have to visit your daughter，please take another route.'”

　　妈妈接着说:“他离开时，转过身，冲着我说:‘夫人，你下次要看儿女时，请走另一条路线吧!’”

　　讲给孩子听的英语笑话四：A Girl's Name

　　When our daughter was born, we named her Myles, after my beloved late(已故的) father, despite family warning that the name was too masculine(男性的) .

　　Years later, when I felt she was old enough to understand, I explained to Myles, Your name is very special. I named you after my own father because I loved him very much. I know he would be proud of you.

　　Myles thought carefully about this and then said, I know all that, Mom. But I don't understand why my grandfather had a girl's name.

　　女孩的名字

　　女儿出生时，我们给她取名叫迈尔斯，和我深爱的'业已过世的父亲同一个名字，不过家人提醒这个名字太男性化了。

　　几年以后，我觉得迈尔斯已经长大，能够懂事了。我对她解释说：你的名字很特别。我给你取了一个和我爸爸一样的名字，因为我非常爱他。我相信他会为你而深感自豪的。

　　迈尔斯很仔细地想了一下，然后说道：这些我都懂，妈妈。可是我不知道外公为什么会有一个女孩子的名字。