几则幽默雷人英语笑话

　　中间战术 Midway Tactics

　　Midway Tactics

　　Three competing store owners rented adjoining(毗连的) shops in a mall. Observers waited formayhem(故意的伤害罪，蓄意的破坏) to ensue.

　　The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, Gigantic Sale! and Super Bargains!

　　The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, Prices Slashed! and Fantastic Discounts!

　　The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, ENTRANCE.

　　中间战术

　　三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺，旁观者等着瞧好戏。

　　右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：大减价!特便宜!

　　左边的.商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：大砍价!大折扣!

　　中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：入口处。

　　如此长的狗 Such a Long Dog

　　Once there was a blind. One day when he was walking, he stepped the head of the dog who was sleeping. The dog barked for a while. The blind man went on for miles, this time he stepped the other dog's tail, so this dog barked. The blind man had thought that it was the first dog, so he said in surprise, It's a wonder that the dog is so long.

　　从前有个瞎子。一天，他正在行路时踩着了一只正在睡觉的狗的脑袋，狗汪汪汪地叫了一阵。这人又往前走，这回踩着的是另外一只狗的尾巴，狗又汪汪汪地叫起来。瞎子以为还是那条狗，惊诧地说：奇怪，这只狗可真够长的。

　　区别 Difference

　　"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles.

　　"When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."

　　“研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来，”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我们研究生上工程学课的老师如此说。

　　“我说‘下午好’，本科生们回答说‘下午好’。研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本上。”