英语笑话带翻译爆笑

　　带翻译爆笑版

　　1Reggie: We have got a new dog. Would you like to come around and play with him?

　　Ron: Well, I don't know---does he bite?

　　Reggie: That's what I want to find out.

　　里基：我们又得到了一条新狗，你愿意过来和他玩一会吗?

　　罗恩：嗯，我不知道----它咬人吗?

　　里基：这正是我想要查明的。

　　2Professor: When is your birthday?

　　Kid: May 30.

　　Professor: Which year?

　　Kid: Every year.

　　教授：你的`生日是什么时候?

　　孩子：5月30日。

　　教授：哪一年?

　　孩子：每年都是。

　　3Little brother: I saw you kiss my elder sister, and if you don't give me a nickel I'll tell my father.

　　Sister's boyfriend: No, don't do that. Here's a nickel.

　　Little brother: That makes a buck and a quarter I've made this month.

　　弟弟：我看见你亲我姐姐了，如果你不给我五分钱，我就告诉我爸。

　　姐姐的男朋友：不要那样做。给你五分钱。

　　弟弟：我这个月已经赚了一块两毛五了。

　　4A Sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad. Now, children, said she, has anyone of you ever made someone else glad?

　　Please, teacher, said a small boy, I've made someone glad yesterday.

　　Well done. Who was that?

　　My granny.

　　Good boy. Now tell us how you made your grand mother glad.

　　Please, teacher, I went to see her yesterday, and stayed with her three hours. Then I said to her, ‘Granny, I'm going home,’ and she said, ‘Well, I'm glad’!

　　一个主日学校的老师正在对学生讲使别人高兴的重要性。现在，孩子们，她说：你们当中有谁让别人高兴过?

　　我，老师，一个小男孩说：昨天我就使别人高兴过。

　　做得好，是谁呢?

　　我奶奶。

　　好孩子，现在告诉我们，你是怎样使你奶奶高兴的。

　　是这样的，老师。我昨天去看她，在她那儿呆了三个小时。然后我跟她说：‘奶奶，我要回家了。’她说：‘啊，我很高兴!’

　　5When they're together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. one Saturday, I put my foot down. "All right, you two," I said sternly. "No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting."

　　As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, "C'mon, Steven, let's get dirty . "

　　我五岁的儿子和他的表弟在一起的时候，总要招来大乱。一个星期六，我开始抗议了。“好啦，你们两个，”我严厉地说，“不许叫喊，不许乱拿，不许哭闹，不许乱敲，不许取笑，不许扯淡，不许弄坏玩具，不许乱抓，不许打架。” 我刚转身要走，就听我儿子说：“来，斯蒂文，我们来把自己弄脏吧。”

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