笑话大全爆笑英语笑话

　　I've Just Bitten My Tongue

　　"Are wepoisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.

　　"Yes,dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"

　　"Cause I'vejust bitten my tongue! "

　　我刚咬破自己的舌头

　　“我们有毒吗?”一个年幼的蛇问它的母亲。

　　“是的，亲爱的，”她回答说，“你问这个干什么?”

　　“因为我刚刚咬破自己的舌头。”

 

　　A Woman Who Fell

　　It was rush hourand I was dashing to a train in New York City's Grand Central Terminal - As I neared thegate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing onthe smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her closeto my shoes. Before I could help her, however, she had scrambled up. Gainingher composure, she winked at me and said, "Do you always have beautifulwomen failing at your feet?"

　　摔倒的女人

　　上下班高峰期，我匆匆奔向纽约豪华中心站去赶一趟火车。接近门口，一位肥胖的中年妇女从后面冲过来，没想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了脚，仰面滑倒了。她的惯性使她接近了我的脚。我正准备扶她，她却自己爬了起来。她镇定了一下，对我挤了一下眉，说道：“总是有漂亮女人拜倒在你脚下吗?”

 

　　Q: Which is thestrongest creature in the world?

　　A: The snail. Itcarries its house on its back.

　　因为snail(蜗牛)的后背上总是背着一所房子，所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的.生物是不足为奇的。你说呢?

 

　　Q: What do peopledo in a clock factory?

　　A: They make facesall day.

　　一看到make faces这个短语，你可千万别以为是在钟表厂工作的人整天都做鬼脸呀!因为除了这个意思以外，它还可以从字面上解释为制造钟面。

 

　　Q: How do you stopa sleepwalker from walking in his sleep?

　　A: Keep him awake.

　　怎样才能不让梦游者(sleepwalker)梦游(walk inhis sleep)呢?最简单的方法就是不让他睡觉。虽然这不是治疗方法，但如果让梦游者醒着呢，他的确就不会去梦游了。

 

　　They are directly from America

　　Not long after anold Chinese woman came back toChinafrom her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank todeposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerkchecked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old ladyout of patience.

　　At last she couldnot hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They arereal US dollars. They are directly fromAmerica."

　　它们是从美国直接带来的

　　一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久，到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。在银行柜台，银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票，看是否有假。

　　这种做法让老妇人很不耐烦，最后实在忍耐不住说：“相信我，先生，也请你相信这些钞票。这都是真正的美元，它们是从美国直接带来的。”