原创英语笑话五则

　　一、Keep feeding him nickels

　　A mother saw her three-year-old son put nickel in his mouth and swallowed it .She immediately picked hime up, turned him upside down and hit him on the back, whereupon he coughed up two dimes.Frantically, she called to the father outside.

　　Your son just swallowed a nickel and coughed up two dimes!What shall I do ?

　　Yelled back the father ,Keep feeding him nickels!

　　二、So Hospitable the boy is!

　　The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.

　　三、The Nice Wedding Gift

　　We attended the wedding of an acquaintance's son. Because we did not know the young man or his bride, we decided to send them a practical household gift, a fire extinguisher. Apparently, the couple mass-produced their thank-you notes because we received a card saying: Thank you very much for the nice wedding gift. We look forward to using it soon.

　　四、Bring Me a Glass of Milk

　　At 2 a. m, Mrs. Culkin was convinced that she had heard a prowler in the living, room. Tiptoe down-stairs, she told her husband. Don' t turn on the lights. Sneak up him before he knows what's happening

　　Dutifully Mr. Culkin put on his robe. Just as he reached the bedroom door, his wife added, And when you come back, bring me a glass of milk.

　　五、Be Careful What You Wish For

　　A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.

　　During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.

　　The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.

　　Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, Well, I'd like to have a woman 30 years younger than me.

　　The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.