英语笑话搞笑两篇

　　(一)

　　The doctor lives downstairs

　　"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me."

　　He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds. Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I'm an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."

　　医生住在楼下

　　“医生”她冲进屋后大声说道。

　　“我想让你坦率地说我到底得了什么病。”

　　他从头到脚打量打量她，然后大声说：“太太，我有三件事要对你说。第一，您的体重需要减少大约50磅;第二，如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口红，您的美貌将会改变。第三，我是一位画家——医生住在楼下。”

　　英语笑话(二)

　　Teacher of Physical Education: Have you ever seen mixed doubles，boys?

　　Nick: Yes，sir. Quite of ten. I saw it even last night.

　　Teacher: Please tell us some thing about it.

　　Nick: Oh，sorry，sir. My father always says, "Domestic shame should not be published.”

　　体育老师：孩子们，你们见过男女混合双打吗?

　　尼克：见过，老师，经常见。就在昨天夜里我还见过呢!

　　老师：那你给大家讲讲当时的情形吧。

　　尼克：啊，对不起，老师。我爸爸常说:“家丑不可外扬。”