英文短篇笑话故事

　　幽默的人不仅仅会说笑话，还要懂得他人说的笑话，来测试一下你的幽默细胞的指数有多高吧!

　　英文短篇(一)

　　Hours of consultation 诊疗时间

　　It was half pass three. The doctor just lay down to have a nap when he heard a loud knock on the door. He got up and asked the man at the door: "What is it?"

　　"I've been bitten by a dog," said the man painfully.

　　"Well, don't you know that my hours of consultation are between twelve and three?" said the doctor unpleasantly.

　　"I know," groaned the man, "but that confounded(困惑的) dog didn't know, It bit me at twenty past three."

　　下午三点半钟时，医生刚刚躺下想小睡一会儿，就听到有人大声敲门。他起身问门口的人：“什么事呀?”

　　门口那个人痛苦地说：“我被狗咬了。”

　　医生很不高兴地说：“哦，你不知道我诊病的时间是12点到3点吗?”

　　那个人呻吟着说：“我知道，可是那只该死的狗不知道。它在3点20分咬了我。”

　　英文短篇笑话故事(二)

　　I'll Change My Name 我会改一个名字

　　At the age of 16, Edely decided to leave home and join a theater company. His father wasappalled(惊骇的), "A son of mine on the stage? It's a disgrace!" he wailed. "What if the neighbors find out?"

　　"I'll change my name," the comic-to-be volunteered. "

　　"Change your name!" His father screamed. "What if you're a success? How will the neighbors know it's my son?"

　　埃迪十六岁了，他决定离开家去参加一个剧团。他的爸爸气坏了。 “让我的儿子上舞台演戏?真丢脸!”他大叫道，“邻居们知道了怎么想?”

　　“我会改一个名字。”这位未来的滑稽演员主动提出。

　　“改名字!”他爸爸喊叫着，“那如果你出了名怎么办?怎么让邻居们知道你就是我的儿子呢?”

　　英文短篇笑话故事(三)

　　My God 我的上帝啊

　　A Scotsman, carrying a huge suitcase, has been riding a London bus for five miles along its route, all the while attempting to avoid the ticket collector.

　　Finally, the conductor manages to corner him and tells him to pay up："You've been on for five miles -- that'll be 50 pennies, please, and 10 pennies for your suitcase."

　　The Scotsman responds："I haven't, I want to have a penny fare, just got on this very moment." They begin to argue, and the ticket collector become more and more enraged and finally, as the bus is passing over London bridge, he grabs the Scotsman's suitcase, and hurls it out of the bus.

　　It lands in the river and sinks without a trace. The Scotsman stands shocked for a moment and says to the ticket collector, "My God!Not only are you treat to overcharge me for the ticket—but now you're gone a drowned my boy Jenny."

　　一个苏格兰人提着一只大箱子，坐上了一辆开往伦敦的.汽车。上车后，在汽车行驶了5英里的这段路上，他一直在试图躲开售票员。

　　售票员最终还是找到了他，并叫他补票:“你已经坐了5英里了，请付50便士，你的箱子还要付10便士。”

　　苏格兰人答道：“我是不会付那么多钱的。我只付1便士，因为我刚刚上车。”最后，他们争吵起来。售票员越吵越生气，终于在车子行驶到伦敦大桥上时，抓起苏格兰人的箱子，用力扔出了车外。

　　箱子掉进河里，沉了下去。苏格兰人惊呆了，怔怔地站在那里，片刻之后对售票员说：“我的上帝啊!你不仅向我多收票钱，现在还淹死了我的儿子强尼。”