搞笑英语小笑话

　　搞笑英语一：

　　fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite.

　　The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. But the fat man knew he was the more courteous because, whenever he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down.

　　一个胖男人和一个瘦男人正在为谁更有礼貌而争吵。

　　瘦男人说他更礼貌，因为他总是向一个女士脱帽致意。但是胖男人说他更礼貌，因为无论何时他起身给女士让座总是能让两位女士同时坐下。

　　搞笑英语小笑话二：

　　When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"

　　"I wasn't asleep," the man answered.

　　"Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed."

　　"I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."

　　当一群妇女上车之后，车上的`座位全都被占满了。售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了，他担心这个人会坐过站，就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他，说：“先生，醒醒!”

　　“我没有睡着。”那个男人回答。

　　“没睡着?可是你眼睛都闭上了呀?”

　　“我知道，我只是不愿意看到在拥挤的车上有女士站在我身边而已。”

　　搞笑英语小笑话三：

　　A Jealous Wife

　　There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night

　　and she couldn’t find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him," Great, so now you’

　　re cheating on me with a bald woman!"

　　The next night, when she didn’t smell any perfume, she yelled again by

　　saying, "She’s not only bald, but she’s too cheap to buy any perfume!"

　　从前有个妻子醋劲很大。一天晚上丈夫回家，她没有从他衣服上找到头发，于是大叫：“好啊，现在你开始和秃头的女人骗我了!”

　　第二天晚上，她没有从丈夫衣服上闻到香水味，于是又大叫：“她不但是个秃头，而且很穷酸，连香水都不买。”