爆笑英文笑话大全
1、A:How ‘bout we try my new “snuff ball” pitch? A:试试我新的必杀球怎么样? B: What’s that? B:怎么做的? A: First, I remove “a pinch” from between my cheek and my gums… A:首先，先把球放在我的脸颊和牙齿中间······ ······ B: That’s enough, I don’t wanna hear the rest B:够了，饿哦不想听后面的了。
2、The Choice of Word One day, John was back home after work. He found that his wife was shaking their daughter who was only half a year old. She said Da-Dy to the baby many times. John felt very happy because he thought his wife chose the word Dady to teach their baby. During one night several weeks later, John and his wife were waken up by the cry Dady. His wife said to him, Darling, she is calling you. Then she turned to sleep. 选词 一天下班回家，约翰发现妻子在摇半岁的女儿，嘴里反复念道：“爸-爸。”约翰心里感到美滋滋的.，他的妻子选择了“爸爸”这个词首先教孩子。 几周后的一天夜里，约翰和妻子被一阵哭声惊醒了，“爸-爸!”“她在叫你，亲爱的。”妻子说，然后翻身竟自睡了。
3、The Los Angeles Police Department,the FBI,and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are thebest at apprehending criminals. 洛杉矶警察局、联邦调查局和中央情报局，都想要证明他们最会逮捕罪犯。 The President decides to give them a test. 于是总统决定要考考他们。 He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. 他把一只兔子放进森林，而他们每一个人都必须去抓它。 The CIA goes in. 中央情报局的人进去了。 They place animal informants throughout the forest. 他们在整个森林里放置了动物通报器。 They question all plant and mineral witnesses. 他们质问所有的 植物和矿物证人。 After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist. 就在三个月的密集调查之后，他们得到的结论就是兔子不存在。 The FBI goes in.After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest , 联邦调查局韵人进去了。就在两个星期都没有线索之后， killing everything in it,including the rabbit,and they make no apologies. 他们放火把森林烧了，杀光了里面的一切，包括这只，兔子在内 ，而且他们并没有表现出歉意。 The LAPD goes in.They come out two hours later with a baddly beaten bear. 洛杉矾警察局的人进去了。两个小时之后，他们带着一只惨遭严重殴打的熊出来。 The bear is yelling;"Ok!I am a rabbit!I'm a rabbit!" 这只熊大声地喊着说：“好啦!好啦!我是兔子啦!我是兔子啦!”