超爆笑的英语笑话带翻译
冷笑话是近几年才出现的新兴语言现象，它以网络为主要的传播方式。它是幽默的一种特殊的表现形式，主要流传于网页，微博，贴吧等。下面是小编带来超爆笑的带翻译，欢迎阅读!
超爆笑的英语笑话篇一
尽管读
When we work evenings .we often order take-out food at the office.One night we all gave our orders to Sharon, who wrote the selections on a self-stick note. Unable to find our list when she arrived at the fastfood restaurant, Sharon stepped up to the counter. But before she could speak, the cashier recited the exact order. " How could you possibly know that?"asked Sharon.
在我晚上上夜班的办公室，大家常常订些外卖食品来吃。一天夜里，我们都找沙伦订了食品。她把订单列在一张不干胶的纸条上。等她到了饭店时，怎么也找不到那张订单了。沙伦走到柜台前，还没等她说话，收银员就背出了所有大家订的东西。沙伦问:“你怎么会知道这些的呢?”
"Tt's right there," replied the cashier,"stuck to your chest."
“它就在这儿，”收银页说:“贴在了你的胸前。”
超爆笑的英语笑话篇二
拍卖!
When we decided to sell our house, we nailed "FOR SALE BY OWNER" signs on two trees in our front yard. Before long，the doorbell rang.”How much are you asking for the treesp"a young man asked.
我们决定卖掉我们的房子。于是，我们就在院前的大树上钉了两块牌子，上面写着:“拍卖。”没过多久，我们的门铃就响了。一位年轻人问:“你们的树想卖多少钱?”
超爆笑的英语笑话篇三
解决难题
Some friends and I stopped at an ice-cream parlor.where I asked for my favorite，a hot-fudge sundae with chocolate ice cream. But when the waitress brought our orders，I saw that mine had vanilla ice cream. " I ordered chocolate,"I pointed out.
我和一位朋友来到一家冰淇琳店。我要了一个我最喜欢吃的巧克力奶油圣代。当女招待送来我的冰淇淋时，我发现我的冰淇沐是香草的。我说:“我要的是巧克力的。”
The young woman consulted her order pad and responded，"So you did. I'll take it back and get chocolate."
那位年轻的女士查了一下订单回答说:“你确实要的是巧克力的。我把它拿回去，再给你拿一个巧克力的。”
“Never mind，”I said.”I don't like to see anything wasted."
“没关系，”我说:“我不想浪费东西。”
"Nothing is wasted around here!"she insisted.“We eat our mistakes. "
“这儿什么也浪费不了，”女招待坚持说:“我们吃掉自己的错误。”
超爆笑的英语笑话篇四
余音
About to be shipped out on a long tour of duty over-seas，I had called my wife from a coin-operated telephone at an Army camp on the West Coast. As I walked away，the phone rang，and I answered it，expecting to be told of extra charges. "I thought you'd like to know,"the operator said,"that just after you hung up，the woman said,'I love you. "
即将因工作远征出海，我就在西海岸军营地用一个投币电话给我的妻子拨了个电话。我刚要离开，电话铃响了。我估计是让我交超时费，所以只好去接。接话员说:“我想你可能想知道，你刚挂断电话，那个女的就说‘我爱你’。”
超爆笑的英语笑话篇五
尴尬
My parents' tour leader asked everyone to put their large suitcases outside their hotel rooms at bed time so the bus could be loaded for an early departure the next morning. Mom laid out their travelling clothes，repacked their things，took out her hearing aid and went to bed. Dad stepped into the hall to line up their luggage and the door clicked shut behind him，leaving him there in only his underwear.
我父母的'导游负责人让大家在晚上睡觉前把箱子放在饭店的房门外。这样，化们可以在次日的凌晨早装车，早出发。妈妈铺开了旅行时穿的衣服，重新打了包。取下了助听器睡觉去了。爸爸要去大厅放行李，门咔嚓一下在他身后撞上了。他只穿着内裤，束手无策。
"It sure was embarrassing，“he told us later.”Your mother couldn't hear me，so I had to go downstairs and across the street to the office to get another key.”
他事后告诉我们:“我的确很尴尬。你妈妈她又听不见，没办法，我只好下楼穿过街到办公室去要另一把钥匙。”
"But, Grandpa.”our son piped up.”What about the clothes in the suitcase you put in the hall?"
“但是，爷爷，”我们的儿子说:“那么你为什么不穿放在大厅的箱子里的衣服呢?”
超爆笑的英语笑话篇六
Three pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, You know, since summer started I’ve been having trouble with bats in my loft(阁楼) and attic at church. I’ve tried everything----noise, spray, cats----nothing seems to scare them away.
Another said, Yes, me too. I’ve got hundreds living in my belfry(钟楼) and in the attic. I’ve been had the place fumigated(熏制) , and they still won’t go away.
The third said, I baptized(洗礼) all mine, and made them members of the church...haven’t seen one back since!
三个南部的牧师在一家小餐馆里吃午饭。其中的一个说道：“你们知道吗，自从夏天来临，我的教堂的阁楼和顶楼就被蝙蝠骚扰，我用尽了一切办法----噪音、喷雾、猫----似乎什么都不能把它们赶走。”
另外一位说：“是啊，我也是。在我的钟楼和阁楼也有好几百只。我曾经请人把整个地方用烟熏消毒一遍，它们还是赶不走。”
第三个牧师说：“我为我那里的所有蝙蝠洗礼，让它们成为教会的一员......从此一只也没有再回来过。”
超爆笑的英语笑话篇七
Our son, at age of five, had a fascination for motorcycles. The sight of one would always bring forth squeals(长声尖叫) of delight, accompanied by excited remarks of Look at that! Look at that! I'm going to have one of those someday, his dad's response always was Not as long as I'm alive.
One day, while our son was talking to a little friend, a motorcycle passed by. He excitedly pointed it out to the boy and exclaimed, Look at that! Look at that! I'm getting one of those as soon as my dad dies.
我五岁的儿子对摩托车有强烈的爱好。只要看见一辆摩托车，他就会高兴得哇哇直叫，并激动地说：瞧这辆!瞧这辆，我总有一天也要有一辆。他爸爸的回答老是只要我活着，你就别想有这玩艺儿。
一天我们的儿子跟他的小朋友在说话，有一辆摩托车开了过去。他兴奋的指着摩托车叫道瞧这辆!瞧这辆!等我爸一死我就要有这样一辆摩托车了。
超爆笑的英语笑话篇八
A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic.
Here is the situation, she said. A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help.
His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?
A girl raised her hand and asked, to draw out all of his savings?
小学四年级的教师正在给学生们上一堂逻辑课。她举了这么一个例子：有这样一种情况，一个男人在河中心的船上钓鱼，突然失去重心掉进了水里。于是他开始挣扎并喊救命。
他的妻子听到了他的喊声，知道他并不会游泳，所以她就急忙跑向河岸。谁能告诉我这是为什么? 一个女生举手答道，是不是去取他的存款?
超爆笑的英语笑话篇九
Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger.
Will said, "Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's the one who dug the hole for it."
Bill wasn't impressed, "Well, that's nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My father's the one who killed it!"
维尔和比尔在争吵，谁的爸爸是更强壮的一个。维尔说：“你知道太平洋吗?那个坑是我爸爸挖的。”
比尔不屑地说：“那没什么。你知道死海吗? 那是我爸爸打死的。”
超爆笑的英语笑话篇十
Returning from a golf outing(远足，短途旅行) , my husband was greeted at the door by Sara, our four-year-old daughter. Daddy, who won the golf game? You or Uncle Richie?
Uncle Richie and I don't play golf to win, my husband hedged(避免作正面答复) . We just play to have fun.
Undaunted, Sare said, Okay, Daddy, who had more fun?
丈夫打完高尔夫球回来，我们四岁的女儿莎拉在门口迎了上去。爸爸，谁赢了高尔夫球比赛，是你还是理查叔叔?
我和理查叔叔打高尔夫球不是为赢，丈夫推诿说。我们打球只是为了好玩而已。
莎拉毫不气馁，又问：那么，爸爸，谁觉得更好玩呢?