简单易懂的英语笑话
1、Who was the first man? 谁是世界上第一个男人 A teacher said to her class:”Who was the first man?” 一个老师问她的学生：“谁是世界上第一个男人” “George Washington,” a little boy shouted promptly. 一个小男孩立刻大声说：“乔治.华盛顿。” “How do you make out that George Washington was the first man?”asked the teacher，smiling indulgently. 老师带着宠溺的笑容问这个男生：“你如何证明乔治华盛顿是世界上第一个男人呢。” “Because,” said the little boy, “he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.” 这个男孩子说：“因为，他是第一个挑起战争，第一个主张和平，并且是第一个深得民心的人。” But at this point a larger boy held up his hand. “Well,” said the teacher to him, “who do you think was the first man?” 这时，有一个年龄稍大的男孩子举起手来，老师问他，“你认为谁是世界第一个男人?” “I don’t know what his name was, ” said the larger boy, “but I know it wasn’t George Washington, ma’am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him.” 男孩回答说：“我不知道他的名字，但是我肯定他不是乔治华盛顿，因为历史书上说，乔治华盛顿和一个寡妇结婚了，所以在他之前，当然还有一个男的啦。”
2、Always Thirsty 总感到口渴 "I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me." 一个男人对他的朋友说：“我动了一次手术，手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。” "That's terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?" “真是太糟糕了!”朋友说道：“你觉得疼吗?” "No, but I am always thirsty!" “不疼，可是我总感到口渴。”
3、 if I Am a Manager One day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition – if I Am a Manager. All the students began to write except a boy. The teacher went to him and asked the reason. “I am waiting for my secretary,” was the boy’s answer. 如果我是一个经理 一天课上，老师要同学们以“如果我是一个经理”为题写一篇。 所有的`学生都在动笔写了，只有一个男生例外。老师走过去问他为什么不写。 “我在等我的秘书”。那孩子答道。
4、Quick Cleanup 快速清扫 Unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed around straightening up. She put my father and brother to work cleaning the guest bathroom. Later, when she went to inspect it, she was surprised that the once-cluttered room had been tidied up so quickly. Then she saw the note on the closed shower curtains. It read "Thank you for not looking in the bathtub." 不速之客就在路上，我妈妈，一个完美的家庭主妇，正忙里忙外地整理。她分配给我爸和我哥哥的任务是打扫供客人使用的浴室。一会儿之后，当她去检查的时候，她吃惊了，曾经一度杂乱的房间瞬间就被打扫干净了。接着她看到浴帘上有一张纸条，纸条上写着：“谢谢你没往浴缸里看。”
5、 young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone." 一个年轻人刚刚开始做生意，就租了一个漂亮的办公室。一天，他坐在办公室里，看到有一个人在外面，于是他就装作生意很忙的样子，拿起电话胡吹乱侃，还不停的甩出几个大数字，好像在谈一笔大买卖。 到了最后，他终于挂了电话，问来访的人，“有事儿嘛?”那个人回答，“我是来给你安装电话的。”
6、Two Birds 两只鸟 Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which? 老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗? Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer. 学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。 Teacher: Please tell us. 老师：请说说看。 Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow. 学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。