简单英语笑话短文

　　

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1.ass and man

　　驴和买驴的人

　　A man wanted to buy an ass.He went to the market,and saw a likely one.But he wanted to

　　test him first.So he took the ass home,and put him into the stable with the other asses.

　　The new ass looked around,and immediately went to choose a place next to the laziest ass in

　　the stable.When the man saw this he put a halter on the ass at once,and gave him back to

　　his owner.The owner felt quite surprised.He asked the man,"Why are you back so soon?Have

　　you tested him already?" "I don't want to test him any more," replied the man,"From the

　　companion he chose for himself,I could see what sort of animal he is."

　　中文：一个买主到市场上去买驴,他看中一头外表不错的驴,但是他想要牵走试一试.他把驴牵回家,放

　　在自己其他的驴之间,这驴四处看看,立即走向一头好吃懒做的驴旁边.于是,买驴的人立刻给那头驴套

　　上辔头,牵去还给驴的卖主.卖主感到很奇怪,他问买主：“你怎么这么快就回来了?”买主说：“不必

　　再试了,从他所选择什么样的.朋友来看,我已经知道他是什么样了.”

　　

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2.The Looney Bin

　　疯人院

　　Late one night at the insane asylum (疯人院)one inmate shouted,"I am Napoleon!"

　　Another one said,"How do you know?"

　　The first inmate said,"God told me!"

　　Just then,a voice from another room shouted,"I did not!"

　　一天晚上,在疯人院里,一个病人说："我是拿破仑!"另一个说："你怎么知道?"第一个人说："上帝对

　　我说的!"一会儿,一个声音从另一个房间传来："我没说!"

　　Notes:

　　(1)Looney (俚语)疯子

　　(2)inmate(n.同住者,同室者(特指在医院、监狱))

　　(3)insane asylum (疯人院)

　　

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3.A mother mouse

　　老鼠的第二语言也重要

　　A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she

　　spotted a cat crouched behind a bush.She watched the cat,and

　　the cat watched the mice.

　　Mother mouse barked fiercely,"Woof,woof,woof!" The cat

　　was so terrified that it ran for it's life.

　　Mother mouse turned to her babies and said,"Now,do you

　　understand the value of a second language?"

　　一只母老鼠带着孩子出来散步,突然她看见一只猫正在灌木丛中虎视耽耽.

　　母老鼠向着猫叫道：“汪,汪,汪”,猫听了非常害怕,拼命跑走了.

　　母老鼠回过头洋洋自得的对孩子说：“现在你知道外语的重要性了吧.”