英语笑话故事小短文

　　The Right Leg

　　Proctor(exceedingly angry):So you confess that this unfortunate freshman was carried to this frog pond and drenched?Now what part did you take in this disgraceful affair?

　　Sophomore(meekly):The right leg，sir.

　　右腿

　　学监(非常生气):现在你承认这可怜的新生被扔进这蛙池里，浑身湿透?那么你在这不光彩的事情里扮演了什么角色呢?

　　二年级学生(恭顺地):右腿，先生。

　　The Name of a Poet

　　Our teacher was telling us about a new system of memory training being used in someschools today.

　　“It works like this，”she said. "Suppose you wanted to remember the name of a poet-Robert Burns，for instance.”She told us to think of him as Bobby Burns.“Now get in your head a picture of a London policeman，a bobby in flames. See? Bobby Burns!”

　　“I see what you mean，”said the class know it all.“But how can you tell that it's not Robert Browning?”

　　诗人的名字

　　我们的.老师正在给我们介绍现在某些学校使用的一种新的记忆训练系统。

　　“这个系统是这样的，”她说。“假定你要记住一个诗人的名字一一例如，要记住罗伯特·彭斯的名字。”她告诉我们把他当作博比·彭斯。“让你的脑海里闪现出一个伦敦警察的形象，燃烧着的警察。明白吗?警察燃烧!”

　　“我明白你的意思，”班上的万事通说。“但是你怎么能说那就不是罗伯特·布朗宁呢?”

　　Ashamed Soldier

　　Peter joined the army when he was eighteen, and for several months he was taught how to be a good soldier. He did quite well in everything except shooting.

　　One day he and his friends were practicing their shooting, and all of them were doing quite well except Peter. After he had shot at the target nine times and had not hit it once, the officer who was trying to teach the young soldiers to shoot said, You're quite hopeless, Peter! Don't waste your last bullet too! Go behind that wall and shoot yourself with it!

　　Peter felt ashamed. He went behind the wall, and a few seconds later the officer and the other young soldiers heard the sound of a shot.

　　Heavens! The officer said. Has that silly man really shot himself?

　　He ran behind the wall anxiously, but Peter was all right. I'm sorry, sir, he said, but I missed again.

　　惭愧的士兵

　　彼得十八岁那年参了军，他需要参加几个月的学习以成为一名好士兵。彼得在其他方面都做得很好，但是射击不行。

　　一天他和伙伴们练习射击，除了彼得其他人都没有问题。他射了九次，一次也没有命中目标。这时，教新兵射击的教官说：彼得，你看来是没希望了，不要连最后一发子弹都浪费掉!去那堵墙后面用它向自己打一枪吧。

　　彼得感到非常惭愧。他走到那堵墙后面。几分钟后，教官和新兵们听到一声枪响。

　　上帝!教官叫起来，难道那个笨蛋真的朝自己开枪了?

　　他急忙跑到那堵墙后面，发现彼得安然无恙。对不起，长官，他说，我还是没有命中。