英语小笑话简短

　　你知道学些笑话的好处么?当第一次见面的时候，总是有不知道该说什么的尴尬，这时候你就需要一些笑话，来缓解一下气氛呢，这里小编为你收集整理了简短英语，希望能对你有所帮助哈!

　　英语小笑话简短(一)

　　a man of actions

　　a crowd of student was gathered on the campus of oxford university. “you can have no doubt,” shouted a young man excitedly, “that if the dean does not take back what he said to me this morning, i’ll leave oxford this very evening!”

　　a buzzing noise followed. “what a man of actions!” one said in admiration. “how should we support him and learn from him!” said another.

　　suddenly, a girl asked, “what did the dean say to you, hob?”

　　he bent and whispered to her, “well,er???er???miss rose, er???he told me to get clean away from oxford this very evening!”

　　一个言出必行的人

　　一群学生聚在牛津的校园里，一个年轻人情绪激动地叫道：“毋庸置疑，如果那个家伙不收回他今早对我说的话，我今晚就离开牛津。”

　　下面一片喧哗。“真是个言出必行的.人。”一个人艳羡地说。另一个说：“我们要支持他、学习他。”

　　突然，一个女孩问道：“那家伙对你说什么了，霍波?”

　　他弯下腰小声说：“哦，呃…呃…，罗斯小姐，呃…他说要我今晚从牛津滚出去。”

　　英语小笑话简短(二)

　　a woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch(门廊).

　　一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头。

　　i couldn't help noticing how happy you look, she says. what's your secret for a long, happy life?

　　我无意中发现，你是多么幸福，那女士说。你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么?

　　i smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, ever exercise.

　　我每天抽三包烟，每周喝一箱威士忌，吃高脂肪食品，而且从来不曾锻炼。

　　wow, that's amazing, says the woman. how old are you?

　　哦，真神奇，女士说。你高寿?

　　twenty-six.

　　二十六。

　　英语小笑话简短(三)

　　"no," growled(咆哮) the quartermaster, "you can't have a new pair of shoes. the pair you have aren't worn out."

　　“不行，”军需官大声说：“你不能领一双新鞋子，你穿着的那双还没有穿破。”

　　"not worn out," cried the recruit, " why, if i step on a dime i can feel if it's head or tails."

　　“没穿破，”新兵叫道：“为什么?如果我踩到一个一角硬币，我可以知道踩着的那面是头还是字。”

　　英语小笑话简短(四)

　　how did you make your fortune?

　　你是怎么发财的?

　　i became the partner of a rich man. he had the money and i had the experience.

　　我变成一个富人的合伙人，他有钱，我有经验。

　　how did that help?

　　那有什么用?

　　now he has the experience and i the money.

　　现在他有经验了，我有钱。