精选搞笑英语笑话集

　　笑一笑，十年少，笑话能愉悦我们的心情，欢迎欣赏精选搞笑集!

　　精选搞笑英语笑话集(一)

　　Two Birds 两只鸟

　　Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

　　老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗?

　　Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

　　学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

　　Teacher: Please tell us.

　　老师：请说说看。

　　Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

　　学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的'就是燕子。

　　精选搞笑英语笑话集(二)

　　a man of actions

　　a crowd of student was gathered on the campus of oxford university. “you can have no doubt,” shouted a young man excitedly, “that if the dean does not take back what he said to me this morning, i’ll leave oxford this very evening!”

　　a buzzing noise followed. “what a man of actions!” one said in admiration. “how should we support him and learn from him!” said another.

　　suddenly, a girl asked, “what did the dean say to you, hob?”

　　he bent and whispered to her, “well,er???er???miss rose, er???he told me to get clean away from oxford this very evening!”

　　一个言出必行的人

　　一群学生聚在牛津的校园里，一个年轻人情绪激动地叫道：“毋庸置疑，如果那个家伙不收回他今早对我说的话，我今晚就离开牛津。”

　　下面一片喧哗。“真是个言出必行的人。”一个人艳羡地说。另一个说：“我们要支持他、学习他。”

　　突然，一个女孩问道：“那家伙对你说什么了，霍波?”

　　他弯下腰小声说：“哦，呃…呃…，罗斯小姐，呃…他说要我今晚从牛津滚出去。”

　　精选搞笑英语笑话集(三)

　　who was the first man? 谁是世界上第一个男人

　　a teacher said to her class:”who was the first man?”

　　一个老师问她的学生：“谁是世界上第一个男人”

　　“george washington,” a little boy shouted promptly.

　　一个小男孩立刻大声说：“乔治.华盛顿。”

　　“how do you make out that george washington was the first man?”asked the teacher，smiling indulgently.

　　老师带着宠溺的笑容问这个男生：“你如何证明乔治华盛顿是世界上第一个男人呢。”

　　“because,” said the little boy, “he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”

　　这个男孩子说：“因为，他是第一个挑起战争，第一个主张和平，并且是第一个深得民心的人。”