英语文化故事笑话
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篇【
1】：英语文化故事笑话
The preacher was vexedbecause a certain member of his congregation always fell asleep during the sermon.
As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon.
So, in a whisper, he asked the congregation.
"All who want to go to heaven, please rise."
Everyone got up except the snorer.
After whispering "Be seated", the minister shouted at the top of his voiced,
"All those who want to be with the devil, please rise."
Awaking with a start ， the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacher standing tall and angry in the pulpi——
"Well, sir," he said, "I don't know what we're voting on,
but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it."
牧师非常生气，因为总有一个人在他说教时打瞌睡。
一个星期天，正当坐在前排的那个人又在瞌睡时，牧师决定要好好教育他一下，
让他不要再在布道时睡觉。
于是他低声对信徒们说：“想去天堂的人，都请站起来吧。”
所有的人都站了起来——
当然，除了那个打瞌睡的人。
在低声说过请坐后，牧师高声喊道：“想去下地狱的人请站起来!”
打瞌睡的'人被这突然的喊叫声惊醒了，他站了起来。
看到牧师高站在教坛上，正生气的看着他。
这个人说道：“噢，先生，我不知道我们在选什么，
但看上去只有你和我是候选人。”
篇【
2】：英语文化故事笑话
Ivan came home with a bloody nose
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。
and his mother asked, "What happened?"
他妈妈问，“发生了什么事?”
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.“
一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan.
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。
"I have his ear in my pocket."
“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
篇【
3】：英语文化故事笑话
The school girl was sitting with her feet streched far out into the aisle ,
个女学生坐在座位上，脚却伸到课桌间的走道里
and was busily chewing gum,
嘴里起劲地嚼着口香糖，
when the teacher espied her.
被老师发现了
"Mary !" called the teacher sharply.
“玛丽!”老师严厉地叫她。
"Yes,Madam?" questioned the pupil ,
“什么事，老师?”这女学生问。
"Take that gum out of your mouth and put your feet in!"
“把口香糖从嘴里拿出来，把脚放进去。”