笑话大全笑破你的肚子长英语笑话
接下来下方高能，yjbys小编即将为您献上多篇爆笑，让您乐不停。 感恩节英语笑话 mirth is the foremost capsule to keep our life lively. with an honest effort to fill your thanksgiving day with laughter, we have brought some jokes to share with family and friends that will keep us laughing and rolling with laughter during thanksgiving feast: - this pampered young lady had left her family for the first time to join the college and was feeling quite lonely on thanksgiving. she decided to cook a thanksgiving dinner for herself. she was narrating her first experience in the kitchen to her mother and mother really wanted to know about the results. when asked how the food was, the lady replied with a shudder that though the ready-made soup and pizza were great, she had quite a trouble with turkey. trying to get to the root of the problem, the mother asked, "was it burnt?" the lady replied, "oh! i couldn't taste it mom. it simply wouldn't sit still!" - here is a funny (and repelling!) trick to do in front of your friends just before dinner, if you do not want them to eat too much on your cost. load your plate up high with everything including the salad, a piece of turkey, a bit of soup and some bread crumbles. toss it all in the blender and offer your new thanksgiving weight loss shake to everyone. you can be sure to delay the dinnertime by an hour at least with this trick. - did you hear the one-liner about turkey crossing the road on thanksgiving because it was the chicken's day off? - a teacher gave her students of second grade to write an assignment on 'what i'm thankful for on thanksgiving?' she couldn't agree enough with one of the wisest students in her class who wrote that she was thankful that she was 'not' a turkey. - the escalating sales of turkey legs inspired a poultry farmer to research and breed a turkey with more legs and thus, reap more profits for him. it was only after many years that he finally succeeded in breeding one with six legs! the news of his success reached the media and reporters questioned him about the taste of the turkey he had bred. the intellectual whispered with a grave face, "what i wouldn't give to catch it!" 关于愚人节的笑话(英文版)4.1愚人节快到啦，应届毕业生网今天为大家分享一篇关于愚人节的笑话(英文版)的文章，喜欢的`朋友不妨看看。
1.-What the day is it today? -Today is April fools'day. -Oh!you are wrong today is March the 31th.If you don't believe me please pick up the calendar. -Oh!it is really April fools'day. -Haha!you were cheated!
2.Best wishes and I believe your English will be better and better!
3.A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok,mommy." and goes to sleep. the next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn''t come true!". The mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"
4.Wife talking to her husband (who reads newspaper all day): I wish I were a newspaper so I'll be in your hands all day. Husband: I wish that too, so I could change you daily
5.A little boy asked his father: Daddy, how much does it cost to get married? The father replied: I don 't know son. I 'm still paying!!
6.At midnight father saw that his married son leaving home... He asks him: what are you doing? The son replied: Dad I am fed up with my life! My newly marriage is not going well, my wife and my mom keep fighting with each other! I have to pay bills for my in-laws, and I hate this life!!! I want to go far from here, I want to taste every joy of life, and I want to have every fun of life!!! Father said: Wait!!!!!!!! I am coming with you
7.A woman goes to England to attend a 2-week company training session. Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip. The wife answered: Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you? The husband laughed and said: An English girl!!! The woman kept quiet and left. Two weeks later he picked her up in the airport and asked: So honey, how was the trip? The wife: Very good, thank you. The husband: And, what happened to my present? The wife: Which present? The husband: What I asked for: the English girl? The wife: Oh, that! Well, I did what I could; now we have to wait a few months to see if it’s a girl!!!
8.A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked woman with only her privates covered with leaves. The wife doesn 't like it and moves on, but the husband keeps looking. The wife asks, "What are you waiting for? " The husband replies, "autumn. " Smaller Fish 小鱼 Two men were in a restaurant and order fish, 有两名男子在餐厅点鱼。 The waiter brought a dish with two fish, 服务生端来装着两条鱼的盘子， one larger than the other. 其中一条鱼比另外一条来得大。 One of the men said to the other,"Please help yourself." 当中一位男子跟另外一位说： The other one said"Ok," “别客气，请自行取用呀。” and helped himself to the larger fish. 另外一位男子说：“好”， After a tense silence, 于是就帮自己挑了比较大条的鱼 。 the first one said,"really,if you had offered me the first choice,i would have taken the smallerfish!" 就在一阵气氛紧张的沉默之后，第一位男子就说：“真是的。如果你要我先选，我就会拿比较小条的鱼。” The other one replied,"What are you complaining for?you have it,don't you?" 另一位男子回答说：“那你在抱怨个什么劲呀?你现在已经拿了呀，不是吗?”