英语笑话大全带汉语

　　The mean man's party

　　The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot." "Why use my elbow and foot?"

　　"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, are you?

　　吝啬鬼请客

　　一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼，找中间那个门，然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后，再用你的`脚把门推开。” “为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”

　　“你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪，你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答。 I think that I'm a chicken Psychiatrist: What's your problem? Patient: I think I'm a chicken.

　　Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I was an egg! 精神病医师：你哪里不舒服? 病人：我认为我是一只鸡。

　　精神病医师：这种情况从什么时候开始的? 病人：从我还是一只蛋的时候开始。

　　I think that I'm a chicken Psychiatrist: What's your problem? Patient: I think I'm a chicken.

　　Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I was an egg!

　　精神病医师：你哪里不舒服? 病人：我认为我是一只鸡。

　　精神病医师：这种情况从什么时候开始的? 病人：从我还是一只蛋的时候开始。

　　Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones." Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you." Johnson: "But I want you to." Wife: "But why?"

　　Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!"

　　译文：

　　老农约翰逊就要死了。他的家人都站在床边。他声音低沉地对妻子说：“我死后，我想你嫁给农夫琼斯。”

　　妻子说：“不，在你死后，我不能嫁给任何人。” 约翰逊：“但我希望你这么做。” 妻子：“为什么?”

　　约翰逊：“因为琼斯曾在一笔贩马的交易中欺骗了我。”