适合学生的英语笑话段子

　　总所周知，笑话是一种缓和气氛的好办法。小编在这里给大家分享适合学生的段子，走过路过不要错过啦!

　　适合学生的英语笑话段子一

　　Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines and reeled in their catch.

　　A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two.

　　"Oh yes, " he said. "They are my friends.

　　"In that case, " warned the officer, "you'd better get them out of here!"

　　"Yes, sir, " the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.

　　三位男子在公园的长椅上坐着。中间的一个在读报纸，另外两个在假装钓鱼。他们给想象的鱼钩上鱼饵，放线，并卷线把鱼抓上来。

　　一位过路警察驻足观察了这个景象，他问中间的那个男子是否认识其他两位。

　　“喔，认识，”他说，“他们是我的朋友。”

　　“那样的话，”警察告诫说，“你最好把他们从这里弄走。”

　　“好的，警官。”那男子回答说，接着就开始疯狂般地做起划桨的动作来。

　　适合学生的英语笑话段子二

　　A man was a butterfingers. He had been suffering from unemployment for months.

　　At last he found a job in a chinaware house. He had worked only a few days when he dropped a large vase.

　　The manager summoned him to the office and told him that money would be deducted from his wages every week until the vase was paid for. He asked: "How much did it cost?" "Five hundred dollars." said the manager. "Oh, that's wonderful," he said happily, "I'm so happy that I have got a steady job at last."

　　有一个人很粗心，老是打烂东西。他已失业好几个月了。

　　最后他在一个瓷器店找到了一个工作。可是才干了几天，他就打烂了一个很大的花瓶。

　　经理把他到办公室去，告诉他每个星期都要扣他的工钱，直到赔偿够了为止。他就问：“那个花瓶值多少钱?”经理说：“值500美元。”他很高兴地说：“啊!太妙了，我非常高兴，终于有个稳定的工作啦。”

　　适合学生的英语笑话段子三

　　Do You Know Who I Am?

　　你知道我是谁吗?

　　It was the final examination for a Biology course at a university. It was designed to weed out some students. The examination was two hours long. After the exam booklets were provided, the professor told the class that any exam booklet that was not on his desk in exactly two hours would not be accepted and the student would fail.

　　这是一所大学的生物课期末考试。考试旨在淘汰部分学生。考试时间为两小时。分发试题册后，教授对学生们说，两小时结束后任何没交的试题册他都不再接收，没交的`学生一律不及格。考试开始后半小时，个学生匆匆跑了进来，向教授要试题册。

　　Half of an hour into the exam, a student came rushing in and asked the professor for an exam booklet.

　　“你没有时间答完试题的，”教授一边把试题册递给学生，一边讽刺地说。

　　"You're not going to have time to finish this," the professor stated sarcastically as he handed the student a booklet.

　　“不，我有，”学生回答。然后他坐下来开始答题两小时后，教授要求交卷，学生们把试卷整理好，交了卷，只有那名迟到的学生还继续写着。一小时后，学生走到教授跟前，教授正坐在桌旁准备下一节课。学生试图把试卷放在桌上的一堆试题册上。

　　"Yes, I will," replied the student. He then took a seat and began writing. After two hours, the professor called for the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in. All except the late student, who continued writing. An hour later, the student came up to the professor who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there

　　“我不会接收的。太晚了。”

　　"I'm not going to accept that. It's late."

　　学生看上去将信将疑，有些生气。

　　The student looked incredulous and angry.

　　“你知道我是谁吗?”

　　"Do you know who I am?"

　　“不，说实话，我不知道，”教授回答说，言语中带着嘲讽的语气。

　　"No, as a matter of fact, I don't," replied the professor with an air of sarcasm in his voice.

　　“你知道我是谁吗?”学生又问，声音更响亮了。

　　"Do you know who I am?" the student asked again in a louder voice.

　　“不知道，我也不在乎”教授回答，面露优越的神色。

　　"No, and I don't care." replied the professor with an air of superiority.

　　“那就好，”学生说着快速地拿起一叠试卷，把他的塞到中间，然后走出了教室。

　　"Good," replied the student, who quickly lifted the stack of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and walked out of the room.