小学英语幽默笑话

　　one car come,one car go,two car peng peng ,one car die

　　George knocked on the door of his friend's house. When his friend's mother answered he asked, “can Albert come out to play? ”

　　“ No,” said the mother, “it's too cold. ”

　　“ Well, then, ” said George, “ can his football come out to play ? ”

　　乔冶敲着他朋友家的门。当朋友的.妈妈来应门时，他问：“阿尔伯特可以出来玩吗? ”

　　“ 不行， ” 那位妈妈说， “ 天气太冷了。 ”

　　“ 噢，那么， ” 乔冶， “ 他的足球可以出来玩吗?

　　Tom: William has asked me for a loan of five pounds. Should I be doing right in lending it to him?

　　Jack: Certainly.

　　Tom: And why?

　　Jack: Because otherwise he would try to borrow it from me.

　　汤姆：威廉向我借五英镑。我该不该借给他?

　　杰克：当然应该了。

　　汤姆：为什么?

　　杰克：否则他就该跟我借了。

　　Q: What's the difference between a monkey and a flea?

　　A: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can't have monkeys.

　　猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢?你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢，那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤，而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。这个答案很有意思吧?

　　Q: How can you most irritate a farmer?

　　A: By treading on his corn?

　　如果你踩了农夫的玉米或是谷物，他肯定会生气的;而如果你踩了农夫脚底的鸡眼，他会更生气。Corn既可以表示“玉米/谷物”，也有“鸡眼”的意思。

　　Q: Which is the strongest creature in the world?

　　A: The snail. It carries its house on its back.

　　因为snail(蜗牛)的后背上总是背着一所房子，所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的生物是不足为奇的。你说呢?Last week, Mrs Black went to London. She didn’t know London very well, and she lost her way. Suddenly she saw a man near a bus stop. She went up to the man and said, “Excuse me! Can you tell me the way to the hospital, please?” The man smiled. He didn’t know English! He came from Germany. But then he put his hand into his pocket, and took out an English dictionary. He looked up some words. Then he said slowly, “I’m sorry I can’t understand you.”

　　上周，布莱克夫人去了一趟伦敦。她不太熟悉伦敦，结果她迷路了。突然她在一个公共汽车站附近看见一位男子。她急忙向这位男子走去，说道：“劳驾您一下!请您告诉我去医院的路，好吗?”这位男子笑了。他听不懂英语。他来自德国。但是他将手伸进了自己的衣袋里，从里面掏出了一本英语词典。他查找到了一些单词。然后他一字一句地说：“我很抱歉我听不懂你说的话。”